LATG rarely accepts guest content, but if you’re determined, here’s what I need:
I want to be informed.
Make me less dumb. Burn a beautiful, fiery hole of brilliance through my brain with a personalized narrative that illustrates your expertise, wit and creativity or weirdness like a paragon of prose.
Be unique. They always claim they are, but they almost never are…
I want you to get silly, you’re allowed to get vulgar, talk about yourself or your dog or your dreams, please just don’t be sterile and boring. If the reader thinks of you as a company mouthpiece for a product or service, they’re going to peace out much faster than they will if they feel like your bff.
I only want long-form content
This is in red for a reason. I’m going to repeat that thing your university professor told you that time: if you have to ask how many words your piece should be, you’re probably not fully aware of how this works, you probably don’t fully understand the topic, or you’re probably trying to get out of doing a thorough job because your content marketing SEO agency wants you to vomit content onto blogs in a desperate attempt to earn back links without a genuine thought towards meaning, and doesn’t much care how. I’ve been that SEO content marketer, so I get it, but this ain’t your boss’s weekly editorial and I know it when I see it. I’m not looking for quick reads – I want to publish content that my readers will become engrossed in and entertained. Your goal should be to help a bored language lover sitting at work procrastinate for 20-30 minutes or so. For reference: my best content is between 7,000 and 10,000 words and takes weeks to complete (albeit, I’m lazy).
Mix your media!
If your content has no images or videos or graphics or side-box things or flashing lights or strippers, I probably don’t want to see it because as I stated above, my goal is to make readers waste a considerable portion of their morning procrastinating at work.
I want to see amazing content featuring videos, infographics, serious research, fun elements like these footnotes1, etc. Dazzle me.
If you’re writing on behalf of your company:
Consider going here instead. Here you’ll find more info about partnership opportunities that go way beyond simply dropping guest posts around the Internet like pathogenic homing beacons for Google.
Go get ’em, champ.
BTW, I made this even easier to digest summary of my guest writing requirements tailored for morons. If you don’t understand what I want yet, click here.
